Human Jungle Gym

My wife warns me not to get down on the floor.

Every time I do it leads to the same thing. Human jungle gym.

One - if not both - of the kids come running directly at me and throw themselves on top of me.

I have four pairs of pants that have holes worn in both knees from playing on the floor with them. Likely my wife will comment with the correct number of ruined pants if I'm wrong.

Lee Dungarees... Can't Bust 'Em, eh?  They clearly don't have kids.  Those pants bit the dust as quickly as any of the others

Why do I keep doing it?  Because I'm a big kid? That's part of it!

I realize there will come a day when they don't want to wrestle with their dad.  They will stop wanting to do a lot of different things with me. I'll be completely uncool. 

Until that time - or my knees go bad - I'll keep getting down onto the floor. 

Before & After Having Kids

Cinnamon rolls on Saturday morning...

Before having the kids...
Coffee for me, milk for Miranda.  We watched the news and had nice conversations.

After having the kids...
Alex sticking his fingers in the icing of my cinnamon roll... and then eating just the top off another. We watch Jake and the Neverland Pirates, Fresh Beat Band or some other Nick Jr or Disney Jr show. Maleah interrupts our conversation to tell us that she "tooted".

Wal-Mart Trips...

Before having the kids...
Getting in and out was quick and painless. Small lists and pretty low costs.  No stress. We might even stop at a few other stores.

After having the kids...
Getting in and out is never quick and sometimes painful. Large lists and increasing costs. Often stressful.. and don't even think about making another stop.

Quiet time...

Before having the kids...
Pretty much all weekend.

After having the kids...
Not until the kids finally fall asleep.

Getting things done around the house...

Before having the kids...

We had the time, but little interest to stay on top of things. Miranda had just one person to clean up after.

After having the kids...

Who has the time to stay on top of things? Miranda has three people to clean up after now. 

Getting ready for work in the mornings...

Before having the kids...

I left early and Miranda woke up and got ready after I left. 

After having the kids...

I leave early and... poor Miranda. Has to get the kids up, get them dressed and takes them to daycare. 

Knowing what love is...

Before having the kids...

Spent large amounts of time with each other; even then it wasn't enough. We couldn't love anyone more than we love each other.

After having the kids...

Spend small amounts of time with each other; it will never be enough. We discovered a part of our hearts that God designed especially for these kids.  Miranda and I still love each other more than anyone else in the world, but our love for Maleah and Alex is a completely new, different and awesome kind of love. 

The kind of crazy, wonderful, amazing love that only God could create. 

Our wallets are thinner (as is my hair), our days are shorter and our patience is constantly tested. Even so, we would not trade them for anything in the world.  We fondly remember the "simpler times"... but we greatly look forward to what is in store.  

Watching them grow up has been one of the best experiences in our lives; we look forward to seeing the people they will become... and we look forward to free public school. :)

Miranda Goes Back to Work

If I had to guess which would be harder - me going back to work after a couple of weeks off with our new baby boy or seeing my wife go back to work after 12 weeks - I would have picked the prior.

I would have been very, very wrong.

Last night was very difficult for me. I was helping my wife get some pictures of the kids on a flash drive so she could have them in her digital photo frame.

All of the pictures were making me smile; then in turn they made me sad. Certain pictures in particular prompted this strange phenomena.

My daughter on the counter making strawberry milk with mommy.

The kids spending time with mommy.

Our son being adorable and smiling at his mommy.

I had to stop finding pictures for me because it made me sad. It is not as if I am worried about their care.

It is the fact that there will be moments that she will not get to experience. These moments - though they happen everyday - are so precious to us. With my wife at home I felt like I experienced those moments as an extension of myself.

I feel awful. I feel as if I should have done more so that she could stay home. I know that unless a day comes where she could stay home I will always be sad that she has to miss any moments with the two most wonderful children in the world.

I miss those moments everyday, but with my wife being home it made missing them a little easier to miss.

Happy Mother's Day

First of all.. I want to wish a Happy Mother's Day to ALL mothers. What you do on a daily basis shapes the lives of your children; whether young or old.

Secondly, I want to send a specific Mother's Day wish out to my wife. Miranda is not only the most amazing wife - she also the best mother that my kids could ever want.

This time that she has spent home with them has been great for them. She's nurturing, she's attentive and she shows them a lot of love. I can think of no better influence on both Maleah and Alex than Miranda.

So, Miranda... Happy Mothers Day and thank you for being my wife and a wonderful mom to our children. I love you!!!

A Super Cereal Blog Post

Was Michael Phelps "Super Cereal"?

Alex was falling asleep every time we would feed him. He was trying really hard to get the formula out, but not much would. With my daughter we went from the "slow" flow nipples to the "medium" flow. Well, apparently "medium" doesn't exist. Now they have slow, fast, and cereal. I wasn't aware cereal was a speed.

Five Years Into the Future....

"Hey son! Slow down buddy! Don't go so super cereal! I told you that when you're riding your bike you can't go so cereal".

Anyhow, now that we are giving him the fast flow he's eating really well.... and really fast. See? Fast flow, fast eating... Slow flow, slow eating... Cereal flow, cereal eating?

I'm moving on.

Yesterday Miranda heard Maleah saying, "Daddy. Baby stuck" over and over again. We assumed she was talking about the little girl across the street. She was outside and Maleah sometimes calls him "daddy" because he's a man. Clearly she understands what "daddy" means. Anyhow, after a minute of it I found Maleah... stuck between a chair and the front picture window! She was trying to get the chair to help me with dishes, but it got stuck on the rug! She was very patient about it. :)

Maleah was moved into a big kid Sunday School class last Sunday. They were going to wait until the class switch happened later this year, but they said she seemed bored (she was playing hide and go seek by herself). Well, I went to pick her up from her new class and she was having a blast! She was playing with a dollhouse with another little girl.

She saw me and said to one of the women in her class, "Kathy, look... Its its its daddy!!!" Then she said, "Daddy, look.... its kids! Look, kids! Look daddy, cars (had cars in her hand). Put cars away (shoved them into a closet in the dollhouse; which was bigger than any closet in my house). C'mon daddy, see mommy! (grabbed my hand) Bye kids! Bye! Bye kids".

Alex is following things well with his eyes; even turning his head if needed. He's been doing that for weeks now. He turns his head when he hears a familiar voice too. He has already started rolling up on his side and he has rolled from his stomach to his back. He grunts a lot. It is rather funny to hear! :)

Miranda is doing well too. She has been eating on her own and making her own decisions on what she wants. She no longer has aversions and now eats lunch meat and hot dogs. :)

Living for a Legacy

As I sat there at my Grandma's funeral I felt many emotions. I felt sad for Grandpa that he lost the love of his life after 65 years. I felt happy for grandma that she has no more pain and is rejoicing with the angels in Heaven. I felt longing to be where Grandma is because this world is not my home. Lastly, I felt disappointed.

The preacher gave a wonderful message of what the Bible says about sorrow, about death, and about eternal life. He spoke about Grandma and her unwavering will and her desire to always help people. He described her as a "prayer warrior", as a "strong Christian woman", and as a person who loved without expectation of anything in return.

He described Grandma the way you would describe any saint from the Bible; and rightfully so. She was an amazing woman that left an incredible legacy. In return, I am disappointed.

If I passed away people would have some nice things to say. People would have some fond memories of me. People would mention that I was a Christian. However, would they be able to describe me like that pastor described my grandma? No, they wouldn't. I've done little to further the message of Christ. I'm as far from being a prayer warrior as Bill Gates is at becoming an action hero. I do just enough to get by; sometimes less. I am eking through my Christian life with nothing to show for it. I'm storing up my things on earth, but my mansion in Heaven is currently bare.

I want to live a Christian life of purpose. I want to lead a life that those behind me can use as a guide. I want to leave more than money or possessions to my children. I want to leave a legacy.

Goodbye Grandma. I love you dearly. you're in a much better place than I am. Thank you for what you left behind. It is the type of inspiring life that causes me to want to do more, be more, and live more. I want to keep your legacy alive. I will struggle and I will fail, but I don't want to give up. I've got a lot of work to do, but I'm ready to do it. The Christian church suffered a huge loss with your passing; one that will be felt for years to come. I will do everything in my power - with Christ's help - to fill those giant shoes you left behind.

"Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord". Matthew 25:23

Fear for Our Children

Does anyone else think things have gotten out of hand when it comes to "protecting" our kids? When I was a kid things weren't so crazy. We picked teams and one team lost, the other won. We received the grades we deserved. We got punished when we did something wrong. There were no "Children with potential" groups, but there was detention. I didn't get my hands sanitized every 10 seconds either.

Fear rules our lives. Fear of offending, fear of failing, fear of working too hard.

Paula Spencer from Newsweek agrees. I love an article she wrote entitled, "We Protect Kids from Everything But Fear" You can read it in its entirety by clicking here.

Just a spark..

A forest fire can be started with a spark. Inspiration is much like a forest fire in that regard. One day my blog was just something Miranda would read and occasionally make a comment about. I asked her to start her own and never really got a response. One day she showed a little bit of interest and that was all I needed. I had her blog set up shortly after that.

Spark.

Then the fire came. Miranda claims I've "created a blogging monster". I think I just gave an outlet to a very creative person. I think I've helped her to find a passion. I didn't create Frankenstein, but I may have just sold a paintbrush to Rembrandt.

Please take the time to read Miranda's new blog. She is witty, funny, and very open about her life. She can laugh at herself which most people can't do. I'm sure it will make you smile. Go check it out now!

It's Still a Wonderful World

I wrote a letter to the editor of the Gazette again. I didn't expect this one to get printed, but it was. It was not put online, but here is the letter in its entirety:

Ten seconds after my daughter was delivered she was in my wife's arms. What a beautiful sight. She was actually here - and we were elated.

We had tried for awhile to have a baby; we even lost a little baby girl, Emily, in the process. My wife was just over 4 months pregnant when she went in for a normal check-up. She went alone. The Doctor couldn't find a heartbeat - and there would be none to find. She was gone. We were devastated. If you have never gone through the loss of a baby consider yourself lucky. If you have - you've been in our prayers. It was the most difficult thing we have had to go through. We made memories - in our minds - that would never be able to be fulfilled.

Less than six months after we lost Emily we became pregnant again. Excitement and fear went hand in hand. Month after month passed and everything was still ok. I wasn't with my wife when she went in for that horrible check-up with Emily. That wouldn't happen again.

Appointments came and went and then on January 19th the most wonderful thing happened. Maleah Desiree came to meet us. We brought her home on the 21st, one of the snowiest days of this winter. I thought I believed in miracles before; then I saw her face.

Through our loss of Emily and our blessing of Maleah we found a renewed faith in God. Two different events in our lives - one horrible and one wonderful - yet they both touched us in a way that will change us forever.

I wanted to share this for one reason - to remind us that in a horrible world there are still good things. In the midst of crime filled streets, wars, and rampant instability we can still find things of great worth in this world.

The colors of fall, our American freedom, great friends, the love of my wife and my baby's smile; those are things that take my breath away. What a wonderful world!

With Great Blessing...

Currently Listening to:Be a Father to Her by Joel Engle

When we are given great and wonderful blessings their are no strings attached. Usually we're given these blessings because we're in the will that God intended for us.

Though nothing is expected in return we do come to find out that the greater the blessing - the greater the responsibility. This isn't a bad thing my any means, but it can be overwhelming.

When Maleah came into our lives we experienced many different emotions. We realized on the first day we brought her home that she was our responsibility. No more nurses coming to take her all night and feed her when she cries. No more pages to the nurse to bring things. We were on our own.

We felt both excited and scared (as any first time parents would feel) as we fumbled through diaper changes, 2AM feedings, and screaming fits. We're now 5 week veterans and we have come to learn that we still don't know what we're doing, but at least we feel more comfortable doing it.

It is amazing to watch this beautiful little girl continue to develop mentally and physically right before our eyes. Those things with little help from us will take care of themselves. We don't have to stretch her to make her grow, but we do have to give her food and let her rest.

We don't have to pump info into her head like a computer, but we do need to give her books to read, good tv programs to watch, and creative outlets to express herself.

She'll learn to walk, talk, run, jump, and get into trouble on her own. We'll just need to be there to help her go in the right direction and not say anything embarrassing!

One lesson she needs to learn from us should be the most important. She needs to not only hear our profession of love and devotion to Jesus, but to see it in action. She needs to see us praying. She needs to hear us read the Bible. She needs to realize that everytime the doors are open we're in church. We need to raise her to love God the way we love Him.

The world is a scary place to raise a child. God help us. That's not just a saying, but our prayer.

Life with a baby

Currently Listening to:Charles Stanley Podcast

I should consider going back through all of my previous posts where I said that I was "very busy" and erase them. The Bob of those days had no idea what he was in for with having a newborn baby. "Busy" back then consisted of a few church commitments and a paper due for school. (Insert mocking noise that sounds like "pssh" or "cuh") I didn't know busy until I met Maleah.

The first week and a half after we brought her home was pretty good. We were just getting to know her tendencies and things were running smoothly. She was sleeping almost all of the way through the night. Then Thursday came. There wasn't any significance to the day - that I know of - and the entire day was like any other day. However, Thursday was the day when the sleeping stopped.

She screamed through the night, every night, for the next couple of weeks. That brings us up to today. Last night was pretty good. She has calmed down a little and slept a little more than usual. Miranda is getting very little sleep and the sleep she is getting is poor. I'm getting less than I usually would and the stress of the situation weighs heavy on us both.

People warned us that we would lose sleep. We knew that, but we didn't know to what extent we would lose our sanity. It is has been pretty hard. However, at the end of the day (or the beginning depending on the circumstances) we feel truly blessed. We will take the screaming, the crying, the fussiness - all of it - just to have her. She is the most beautiful baby and she is destined for great things.

As of today Maleah is just over a month old. They say the fussiness or "colicky" behavior subsides at 3 months. That means the end is in sight! :) Seriously though. We are so thankful to have her and wouldn't trade her for anything in the world. The love you have for a child is unlike any love in the world. I still love my wife above anything or anyone else, but the love I have for Maleah touches deep inside me a new plethora of emotions I never knew were there.

I guess what I am saying is that even though things are tough right now it could be worse; we could have no children at all.